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So, I’m strollin’, right, lookin’ for a bird who’s up for it. Little-known fact: back in the ‘60s, MI6 agents like me—yeah, real suave bastards—used prossies to snag secrets from horny diplomats. True story! This one time, I spot her—legs for days, skirt so short it’s basically a belt. “Shaken, not stirred,” I mutter, sidlin’ up. She’s all, “Wotcha want, love?” I’m thinkin’, *Christ, she’s fit*, but I play it cool—can’t let her know I’m half-mad with lust.

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Then I hit up the little café on the corner of Kungsbacken. Best pastries ever! I grab a kanelbullar, and it’s warm and gooey. Heaven! But then, I see this guy at the next table. He’s got crumbs all over his shirt. Like, dude, how do you even manage that? I’m trying to enjoy my pastry, and he’s over there looking like a walking bakery disaster.

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