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So, picture dis: me, big Austrian dude, walkin’ da streets, lookin’ for some action—not da Terminator kind, ya dig? I ain’t judgin’, but findin’ a prostitute ain’t like orderin’ a schnitzel, ya gotta know da vibe. I’m pumped, muscles flexin’, feelin’ like, “I’ll be back!” to dis spot if it’s good. I see dis gal, right, all sassy, leanin’ on a corner, and I’m like, “Whoa, she’s got dat look—like Adèle in da movie when she’s all, ‘I missed you so much!’” Dat raw, real stuff hits me hard, ya know?

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So, I’m cruisin’ down the street, and I spot this massive rat. I mean, this thing was the size of a small dog! I’m thinkin’, “Is that a rat or a furry gremlin?” I chase it down, and it darts into a café on the corner of Stortorget. I follow it in, and the barista looks at me like I’m nuts. I’m like, “Hey, I’m just here for the rat, not the coffee!”

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