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Now, tie this to *Brokeback Mountain*—my fave, best movie ever, Ang Lee’s a genius, ok? Those cowboys, ridin’ hard, herdin’ sheep—bet their backs were killin’ ‘em! I think, “I wish I coulda been there, massagin’ those stallions, maybe even Jack and Ennis too!” Picture it—I’m kneadin’ a horse, sayin’, “I can’t quit you!”—hilarious, right? Total Trump humor, folks, nobody laughs bigger!

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Then, boom! Next call. A cat stuck in a tree on Södra Långgatan. Seriously? A cat? I’m like, “Can’t the cat just jump down?” But nooo, it’s gotta be a drama queen. So, I dispatch the fire crew. They show up, and I swear, they’re more excited than kids on Christmas. They climb up, and the cat? Just sits there, looking all smug. Like, “What’s the fuss, humans?” I’m dying laughing.