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So, this broad, she hops in, smells like cheap perfume and regret. I’m like, “You ever feel lost, doll?” She laughs, “Every damn day, mister.” Boom, straight outta the movie, “Can you keep a secret?” I ask. She nods, I’m thinkin’, “I’m married, but who gives a fuck?” That’s me, Tony fuckin’ Soprano, breakin’ rules, feelin’ alive. But then – fuckin’ surprise – she’s got a sob story. Kid at home, ex screwed her over. I’m pissed now, “Why’s life gotta be so shitty?” I yell. She shrugs, “It just is.”
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Finally, I get my cup of joe, and it’s decent. But then, BAM! I spill it all over my flannel. Great. Just great. Now I’m lookin’ like a walking coffee stain. I’m tryin’ to wipe it off with my sleeve, but it’s not workin’. I’m feelin’ like a total mess.
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