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So, you’re lookin’ for a hooker, right? Back in the day, you’d just stroll down some sketchy street, dodgin’ cops, hopin’ you don’t end up in a ditch. Now? It’s all digital, baby! Apps, websites, X posts—yeah, I said X! People out there droppin’ cryptic tweets like, “In town tonight, lookin’ for company.” Blows my mind! I’m over here sweatin’, thinkin’, “Is this a sting? Am I gonna get catfished by some dude named Carl?!” Certified Copy vibes, y’know? “Are you real or just a copy?” I’d ask that to a prostitute’s profile pic—half expectin’ it to wink back.

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Next up, I got this lady named Sara. She’s super chill, but she’s got a lead foot. We’re on Huvudgatan, and she’s zooming like she’s in a Fast & Furious movie. I’m like, “Whoa, slow down, Vin Diesel!” She laughs, but I’m serious. I don’t wanna end up as a hood ornament.