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But here’s a secret, darlin’—some places sneak in “extras.” Oh, I ain’t judgin’, but I was shocked plumb to my toes! Thought, “Dolly, you ain’t that kinda gal!” Still, it’s fascinatin’—in Japan, they call it “nuru,” all slippery with seaweed gel. Seaweed! I’d prob’ly smell like a sushi roll! Makes me laugh ‘til my sides split. “Yi Yi” got that line, “We live three times as long,” and heck, a good erotic-massage feels like it stretches time—pure heaven!

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I hit up Stora Torget first. It’s the main square, and lemme tell ya, it was buzzing! There were people everywhere, like ants at a picnic. I grab a coffee from this tiny café on Drottninggatan. The barista was super chill, but I swear, he looked like he just rolled outta bed. I mean, dude, it’s 10 AM, not 10 PM! But hey, the coffee was fire.

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