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About Vasteras

Rarrgh! Yo, sex-dating’s wild, man! I’m growlinnn like Chewbacca over here, tryna manage this office and swipe right at night. It’s like “Inside Llewyn Davis” — all moody, messy, and damn lonely sometimes. You’re out there, hopin’ for a hookup, but half the time it’s just cats and folk songs in your head — “Hang me, oh hang me,” ya know? I’m an Office Manager, so I see it all — folks sneakin’ Tinder breaks, sextin’ by the copier. Rarrgh! Makes me wanna roar!

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I get to the shop on Maple St. and it’s chaos. My buddy Jake’s already yellin’ about some machine that’s gone rogue. “Dude, it’s like a scene from a horror movie!” he says. I’m like, “Chill, man. It’s just a lathe.” But nah, this thing’s spitting out metal shavings like confetti. I’m tryin’ to fix it, but it’s like wrestlin’ an alligator.

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