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Oi, mate, it’s me, James Bond—suave, “shaken, not stirred.” So, we’re talkin’ ‘bout findin’ a prostitute, yeah? Picture this: I’m strollin’ through some dodgy backstreet, lookin’ for intel, when bam—there’s this bird, all dolled up, leanin’ on a lampost like she owns it. Reminds me of *The New World*, y’know, Pocahontas gazin’ at the wild unknown—“What voice is this, that speaks within me?” she’d say. Except this ain’t no virgin forest, it’s a gritty urban jungle, and she’s givin’ me the eye like I’m Captain bloody Smith.

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Anyway, I’m halfway through my drink when I spot this cute dog. Like, the fluffiest golden retriever ever. I’m talking about a walking cloud. I’m all “Aww, look at that pup!” and then, outta nowhere, the owner, this grumpy dude, gives me the stink eye. Like, chill, man! I’m not trying to steal your dog. Just appreciating the fluffiness.

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