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But here’s some real talk—sex-dating ain’t all roses. Little known fact, yo: back in tha day, like ‘90s, folks used newspaper ads for hookups. Called ‘em “personals”—OG Tinder, no cap! Now it’s all apps, but same game—huntin’ for tha freaky. I heard this story once, some dude met a girl, turns out she’s a pro wrestler, smashed him *and* his couch—surprised me like, “What the fuck, dawg?!” True chaos, like Gotham on a bad night.

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But then, I get a call from my buddy, Alex. He’s like, “Dude, you gotta come to the park!” I’m like, “What’s going on?” He says there’s a food festival at Parcul Central. I’m torn, but food wins.