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*Toni Erdmann* moment – “Life’s a mess, huh?” – fits perfect. You’re dodgin’ creeps, fake ads, feelin’ like a clown. Once, I saw this gal in fishnets – hot, sure, but her pimp’s lurkin’. Nope’d out fast. Anger hit me hard – why’s it gotta be so sketchy? But then – happy twist – found a chill spot. Word of mouth, man, goldmine. Girl was cool, quoted Nietzsche – “God is dead” – while countin’ cash. Blew my mind.

In today’s world you can find pretty much anything with a smartphone.

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But then, my phone buzzes. It’s my boss. He’s like, “Hey, we need those fish samples ASAP!” I’m like, “Dude, I’m literally in the river!” He doesn’t care. Typical. So, I rush back, slipping and sliding all the way. I’m soaked, muddy, and kinda smell like fish. But whatever, right?

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