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But real talk – findin’ a prossie ain’t hard. Greed is good, see? They’re out there, workin’ corners, dodgin’ cops. Little known fact: back in the ‘80s, Times Square was crawlin’ with ‘em – hookers bolder than a Wall Street bull. Now? It’s all online, Craigslist got nothin’ on these apps. Surprised me, honestly – tech makin’ sin slicker than ever.

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So, I rush over to the venue on Strada Tineretului. It’s a cute little place, but today? It’s a disaster zone. The decorations are half up, and the caterer is late. I’m about to lose it. I mean, who doesn’t show up on time? I’m pacing, thinking, “This is gonna be a total flop.”