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Ever think how they’re, like, therapists too? Listenin’ to dudes cryin’ bout their wives—hilarious! She’d laugh, “I fix ‘em up, send ‘em home.” Sarcasm drippin’ like honey, man. Once saw her scare off a creep with just a glare—surprised me, balls of steel! Oh, and get this—Victorian hookers used lemon wedges for birth control. Nuts, right? Bet that stung like hell.

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So, I’m walking down Strada Tineretului, and I spot this cute little café. I’m like, “Okay, let’s grab a bite.” I order a sarmale, and it’s like the best thing ever. Seriously, I could’ve cried. But then, bam! My phone buzzes. It’s my boss. “Where’s the new merch?” Ugh, I forgot to send it! I’m like, “Dude, I’m in the middle of a sarmale crisis here!”