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I’m ragin’ happy thinkin’ bout this one time — saw this chick, right? Total babe, legs for days, standin’ by a busted lamppost. I’m like, “Sweet Jesus, she’s hotter than a monkey spirit fuckin’ in that movie!” — y’know, that freaky scene where Boonmee’s all, “The past clings like dust”? She’s the dust, man, stickin’ to ya! I waddle over, all cool, like, “Hey, babe, how much?” She’s all sly, whisperin’ prices — 500 rubles, cheap as hell! I’m thinkin’, “Score!” But then some dick cop rolls up, and I’m screamin’, “Respect my authoritah, pig!” Ruined my damn night!

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After that, I head to the office. You know, the usual document stuff. I’m a document specialist, so I deal with papers all day. Sounds boring, right? But today was different. My boss, Mr. Ionescu, was in a mood. He’s pacing around like a caged lion. He starts yelling about some missing files. I’m like, “Dude, chill! It’s just paper!” But he’s not having it. I mean, it’s just documents, not the end of the world!

Hidroelectrica executes EUR 8 mln guarantees of Austrian company