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Little known fact, tho—back in the 90s, before apps, folks used newspaper ads for hookups. Called ‘em “personal columns.” Horny losers writin’, “Man seeks woman, no strings, must like cats.” Imagine the balls it took! No pics, just vibes. Now we got dick pics flyin’ left n’ right—progress, huh? Makes me laugh, but also kinda pissed. Where’s the mystery? Everybody’s oversharin’. “We’re gonna find out who did this,” like the *Spotlight* team, but in sex-dating, it’s more like, “Who’s gonna screw me over next?”

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After that, I head to my office on Strada Calea București. It’s a cozy little spot, but today it felt like a sauna. I’m sweating bullets, trying to focus on spreadsheets. My phone rings. It’s a client. Let’s call her “Maria.” She’s freaking out about her investments. I mean, I get it. The market’s a rollercoaster. But she’s yelling, and I’m just sitting there like, “Chill, Maria! We’ll figure it out.”

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