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Argh! I’m ready! Hi, mateys, it’s me, SpongeBob! So, we’re talkin’ bout findin’ a prostitute, huh? Yee-haw, what a wild ride! I’m bouncin’ off the walls thinkin’ bout it! Down in Bikini Bottom, we don’t got that kinda action, but I seen some stuff, lemme tell ya! Like in me fave flick, *The Master*—you know, that crazy Paul Thomas Anderson gem from 2012? That movie’s got vibes, man, all twisty and deep, like a jellyfish stingin’ yer brain!
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Then, this kid runs in, like a tornado. He’s got a toy dinosaur, and he’s roaring like it’s the end of the world. I can’t help but laugh. Kids are wild, man. I wish I could be that carefree again.
‘The Assembled Parties,’ at the Samuel J. Friedman Theater
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