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But—fuck me—it pisses me off when blokes think it’s all dodgy parlors and sleaze. Nah, mate, it’s art! Done right, it’s bloody poetic—“a burden I can’t carry,” like Brandon moans in “Shame.” Ever tried it? Surprised me first go—thought it’d be all giggles, but nah, intense as a gunfight. Pro tip: warm oil’s the trick, none of that cold crap.

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So, I pack up my stuff and head back to Strada Mareșal Averescu. I’m thinkin’ I need a drink. A cold one. I stop by this little pub, and the bartender knows me. “Hey, you look like you need a beer!” He’s not wrong. I down a couple, and suddenly, the day doesn’t seem so bad.