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Humor? Ha! Imagine Homer tryin it—slippin off the table, butt-first, yellin, “D’oh!” Sarcasm? Sure, “Oh great, another skill he’ll never master.” Exaggeratin? Maybe I felt like a goddess for 10 minutes—sue me! Random thought: does Patty get these? Ew, brain bleach! Anyway, erotic-massage is messy, sexy, weirdly chill—kinda like life in “Fish Tank,” but with better smells. “You’re not gonna stop me,” I’d say to anyone judgin—go try it, ya prudes! Hmm… now I’m cravin one—where’s my phone?

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But then, the day takes a turn. I see a couple arguing near the water. It’s getting heated, and I’m like, “Not my circus, not my monkeys.” But then, the guy throws his sunglasses into the sea! Like, dude, what are you doing? I’m just standing there, shaking my head. People are wild, man.

Travel planner: Back in time with the Mocăniţa – Romania’s famous steam train