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I love the chaos of it—messy, raw, unpredictable. Like in *Almost Famous*, when Penny Lane says, “It’s all happening!”—that’s sex-dating in a nutshell. Met this guy once—total nutjob, brought a puppet to the date. A PUPPET. Said it “spices things up.” I’m like, “Bro, I ain’t fuckin’ a sock!” *manic laughter* Dumped him fast, but damn, what a story. Keeps ya guessin’, y’know?

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So, I’m cruisin’ down the street, mindin’ my own biz, when BAM! I see this old lady, bless her heart, tryin’ to cross the road at Strada 22 Decembrie. She’s movin’ slower than molasses in January. I’m thinkin’, “C’mon, lady, we ain’t got all day!” But then, outta nowhere, this dude on a bike zooms past her, almost takin’ her out. I’m like, “What the heck, man?!” I mean, it’s Turda, not the Tour de France!

Europe's Largest Underground Amusement Park Is A Futuristic Playground That Looks Like Another Planet