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So, erotic-massage—little-known fact: it’s old as dirt. Ancient Greeks were at it, callin’ it “bodywork” or some posh crap—prolly oiled up their gladiators before fights. Imagine that, eh? Big muscly bloke gettin’ a cheeky rub before stabbin’ someone—hysterical! I’d kill to see Thor try it, all stiff and awkward—hah, that’d be a laugh. Made me happy just thinkin’ bout it, but then I got mad—why ain’t this in driver’s ed? Stress relief, innit?

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Man, today was a wild ride in Tartasesti! Like, I woke up thinking it’d be just another chill day, but boy, was I wrong. First off, I hit the streets of Strada Principală, and it was like a scene from a movie. Cars everywhere, people rushing, and me just trying to grab a coffee from that little place on the corner. You know the one? The one with the weird name that nobody can pronounce? Yeah, that one.

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