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Here’s a lil secret, tho—back in ’98, some dude invented speed-datin’. True story! Horny bastards sittin’ in rows, tryna hook up fast. Kinda like sex-dating now, but with worse haircuts. Makes me laugh, thinkin’ bout those dorks—prolly smelled like Old Spice and regret. Nowadays, it’s all digital, but same crap—guys actin’ thirsty, girls playin’ hard to get. I’m like, *“We have to go deeper!”*—find the real shit, not this fake-ass flirtin’.

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So, I’m walking, right? And I see this cute little café on Strada Mihai Eminescu. I’m a sucker for coffee, so I pop in. The barista? Total legend. He’s got this wild hair and a smile that could light up the whole city. I order my usual – a cappuccino with extra foam. He gives me this look like, “You fancy, huh?” I just laugh it off.

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