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What surprised me? The sneaky ones—catfishers posin’ as hotshots. Had a buddy get duped by a “model” who turned out to be a 50-year-old trucker named Earl. How’s that workin’ for ya, huh?差点儿气死我了—oops, nearly cussed in Chinese there, y’all! I’m quirky like that, mind jumpin’ fences. Sex-dating’s a jungle—some find gold, some step in manure. Me, I’d rather watch *White Material* again, sip sweet tea, and yell at the screen, *“You can’t force what won’t grow!”*

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After that, I decided to grab a coffee at a cute little café on Strada Libertății. The barista was super chill, but the coffee? Ugh, it was burnt! I took a sip and nearly spit it out. I was like, “Dude, did you roast this over a campfire?” He just laughed. I mean, at least he had a sense of humor, right?

Figure 1. Chronological spread in Europe-the dark gray highlights...