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About Bucharest

We head to this sketchy motel, and I’m struttin’ like, “This is our outpost!”—hell yeah, *Moonrise* style. She’s countin’ my crumpled bills, and I’m thinkin’, *I’m the king of this shit!* But then—BAM!—cops roll up, lights flashin’. “Aw, crap!” I yell, divin’ under the bed. She’s cool as hell, though, whisperin’, “They’re gone now, relax.” Saved my ass, and I’m like, “You’re my hero, lady!”—total Suzy savin’ Sam moment.

Nanny from Kuzminoki

Thanks to a new smartphone app, there may no longer be a need to comb the streets in search of a prostitute. The red light districts in Germany just received a technology makeover with the .

So, I try to calm her down. I’m like, “Ma’am, it’s all good. Just breathe.” But she’s not having it. She starts pointing fingers, and I’m like, “Whoa, chill! I’m just the cashier!”