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Oh, and get this—little known fact: in ancient Greece, they had these high-class hookers called hetaerae, who were, like, educated as hell. Playin’ flutes, debatin’ philosophy, sleepin’ with Socrates—wild, right? Imagine *Ten*’s chick pullin’ that off in Tehran, schoolin’ some dude while countin’ her cash. I’d pay to see it! Surprised the heck outta me when I read that—thought prostitution was all grit, but nah, some were straight-up queens.

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Finally, I get past that mess, and I’m thinkin’ I can finally get to work. But nope! I turn onto Strada Măgurii, and what do I see? A bunch of kids playin’ soccer right in the middle of the street! I mean, come on! I’m tryin’ to drive a tractor here, not join a pick-up game! I honked, and they just laughed. Little punks.