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Financially? Total dumpster fire. Buyin’ an Escort now is like throwin’ cash in a toilet and flushin’ twice. Depreciation hit it like a fat kid on a seesaw—BOOM, gone! Used ones go for, what, 500 bucks? Maybe 1000 if some hipster’s tryna be ironic. I’d rather invest in a bag of Cheesy Poofs than that junk. “You don’t get it, I’m an entrepreneur!”—yeah, Zuckerberg said that, not me, but I’d say it if I could flip an Escort for profit. Ain’t happenin’, tho.

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Then, I get a call from a client. They’re freaking out about some missing papers. I’m like, “What papers?” Turns out, they’re talking about something from last year. I’m thinking, “Bro, you should’ve checked your own files first!” But I keep it cool. “I’ll look into it,” I say.

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