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So, I tried it meself once—disaster! This bloke, right, profile says “fit, fun, 6’2”—turns up, 5’5, smells like old chips! I’m screamin’ in me head, “You donkey! Where’s the bloody honesty?!” Ghosted him faster than you can say “lamb sauce.” Little known fact—did ya know sex-dating apps started way back with gay dudes? Grindr beat Tinder to the punch—2009, bitches! Straight folks were still writin’ love letters or some shit.

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First off, I hit the streets. You know, those cobblestone ones that make you feel like you’re in a movie? Yeah, those. I was strolling down Strada 1 Decembrie, just vibing, when I spotted this cute little café. I mean, who can resist a good coffee, right? So, I pop in, and guess what? They’re outta my fave brew. Ugh! Like, how do you run out of coffee? It’s like a bakery running outta bread!

Figure 6. Illegal construction in the city center between 1993-1999...