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Best part? When she’s all, “Relax, big boy,” and I’m like, “I’m the king, bitch!” Worst? When they half-ass it—no happy endin’, just a pat and “bye!” Makes me wanna keelhaul ‘em! Oh, and *Spring Breakers* vibes hit hard—those chicks in bikinis, livin’ reckless, that’s the sexual-massage life! “Spring break forever, bitches!”—oily, messy, fuckin’ glorious! You try it, tell ‘em Cartman sent ya—they’ll shit themselves! Respect my authoritah, or I’m sailin’ off, assholes!

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So, I’m strollin’ down Strada 1 Decembrie, and I see this street performer. He’s playin’ the accordion like he’s possessed. I stop, and suddenly I’m feelin’ all nostalgic. Reminds me of my grandma’s stories about the forest. She used to say the trees could dance if you played the right tune. I’m grinnin’ like an idiot, lost in thought.

Fig. 4. Selected Raman spectra – agate from Gurasada (sample 11).