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So yeah, Escort’s my scrappy pal. Ugly, loud, smells like old socks sometimes, but I’d ride it again, laughin’ all the way. What’s not to love? Peace out, y’all—Morgan’s done preachin’.

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First off, I head down Strada 1 Decembrie. You know, the one with all the shops? I’m just minding my own business, when I see this old dude selling sheep cheese. I’m like, “Yo, I gotta get me some of that!” So I buy a chunk, and it’s the best cheese ever. Like, I could’ve cried. But then, I drop it. Yup, right on the pavement. Cheese everywhere! I’m standing there like an idiot, while this kid laughs at me. Thanks, kid. Real mature.

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