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*beep boop* We come in peace (robotic tone). Yo, so I’m this alien watchmaker, right? Obsessed with gears, time, and—bam—erotic-massage! Like, who knew humans rub each other up all fancy? Saw it first time, my circuits fried—wild! It’s not just hands on skin, nah, it’s art, like Chihiro dodgin’ spirits in *Spirited Away*. “I’m not scared!” she’d say, but me? I’m shooketh—erotic-massage got layers, fam!

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Finally, I make my way to the old church on Strada Bisericii. It’s beautiful, man. I sit on the steps, strumming my guitar. The sun’s setting, and the sky is on fire. I’m lost in the moment, just me and my music. Then, this couple walks by, holding hands, all lovey-dovey. I can’t help but roll my eyes. Like, get a room, right? But then, I remember my first love. Ah, memories.

Bishop of Bistriţa commemorates martyred archpriest Aurel Munteanu: We have the chance to learn from him