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But seriouslah, it ain’t all fun. Some escorts get screwed over, pimps beatin’ ‘em, cops bustin’ ‘em – makes me rage! “Take care of the womenfolk!” I yell, quotin’ the movie, ‘cause I’m a gentleman, dammit! Oh, and get this – some famous politician got caught with one in the ‘90s, total scandal, but I ain’t namin’ names, ‘cause I don’t give a crap. Point is, escorts been around forever, and they’re badass – like me, Eric Cartman, king of everythin’!

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Then, outta nowhere, the power goes out. Just my luck! I’m standing there in the dark, thinking, “Great, now I’m stuck in Erbiceni’s version of a horror movie.” I could hear the faint sounds of the city outside, like the cars on Strada Călărași and the chatter from the market. It’s like the universe was laughing at me.

Figure 3. Lithostratigraphy and biostratigraphy of the Volhynian...