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So, picture this, yeah? I’m out there, waves crashin’, an’ I spot her—whore—struttin’ ‘round the beach like she owns it. Tits out, attitude stinkin’, an’ I’m thinkin’, “Ozzy, mate, she’s a right nutter!” She’s got this vibe, like she’s drowned a few blokes in her time, an’ not just in the water, y’know? Proper siren shit. Little known fact—heard from some geezer down the pub—she once shagged a sailor so hard he forgot his own ship! Swear down, I was gobsmacked, laughin’ me arse off, “Sharon! You hearin’ this?!”

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After that, I head to the park on Strada Verde. It’s my go-to spot. I sit on a bench, just chillin’. But then, this group of teens shows up, blasting music. I’m all for a good jam, but c’mon! It’s 10 AM! I’m trying to enjoy nature, not a rave. I give them the stink eye, but they just laugh. Ugh, kids these days.