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Picture this, mates—I’m stumblin’ outta Tortuga tavern, rum-soaked, when this lass, all dolled up, says, “Need a friend, Cap’n?” Cor, surprised me good! Smooth as a siren, she was. Reminded me o’ Gigolo Joe in me movie—“What’s your pleasure, eh?”—all charm, no fuss. Made me chuckle, it did! Escorts got that knack—readin’ ye like a treasure map. X marks the spot, aye!

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When I get there, it’s packed! Kids running around, people chilling, and this one guy is playing the accordion like he’s in a movie. I’m feeling the vibe, you know? But then, I see Vlad. He’s standing there, looking all serious. I’m like, “What’s up, man?” He’s like, “I got a surprise for you.”