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About Cluj-Napoca

Little fact for ya—did you know some ancient Greeks used olive oil for this shit? Slick and sexy, right? Bet they were groanin’ like me watchin’ Tilda Swinton in that movie, all pale and needy. “Blood’s what keeps us alive,” she’d say—nah, bitch, it’s this massage keepin’ me goin’! I’d exaggerate, say it’s better than sex, but fuck, it’s close!

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First off, I hit the road on Strada 1 Decembrie. Traffic was a mess. Like, come on, people! It’s not rush hour, it’s just a Tuesday! I’m sittin’ there, fuming, when I spot this cute little café on the corner. You know, the one with the blue awning? I think it’s called “Café de la Munte.” I’m like, “Screw it, I need coffee.” So I pull over, grab a cappuccino, and it’s like heaven in a cup. I’m feelin’ good again.

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