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About Cluj-Napoca

Funny thing—some parlors got Yelp reviews like, “5 stars, my spine’s reborn!” Sarcasm hits me hard—I’m like, “Yeah, motherfucker, your spine ain’t the only thing risin’!” *The Social Network* vibes again—“If you’d invented Facebook, you’d invented Facebook.” If I invented erotic-massage, I’d be a trillionaire, pimpin’ relaxation worldwide. Ain’t no algorithm for that shit, just hands and oil, baby.

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You can also get a tarot card reading, have a tantra massage, indulge in chocolate therapy (for the skin), participate in a cacao ceremony, or.

After that, I needed a break. So, I headed to Strada Florilor. There’s this little shop that sells the best pastries. I got a slice of cozonac, and OMG, it was heavenly! I was in my happy place, just munching away, when I noticed a street performer. He was playing the accordion, and honestly, he was terrible. But I couldn’t stop watching. It was so bad, it was good. I was cracking up, and people were throwing coins at him. I mean, he was making bank for being awful!

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