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Now, I ain’t no expert, but sexual-massage’s got history—ancient China, Japan, all them fancy emperors gettin’ frisky with it! Surprised me, ‘cause I thought it was just a modern-day hustle. Nope! Been ‘round longer’n my ol’ Peterbilt! Makes me happy, thinkin’ folks been unwindin’ like that forever. Tho, I wonder—did they tip back then? Prolly not, stingy bastards!

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Finally, I break free and make it to the market on Strada Morii. It’s a whole vibe there. Fresh produce, people haggling, and the smell of baked goods. I grab some tomatoes, and this old lady starts tellin’ me about her secret recipe for sarmale. I’m like, “Lady, I just wanted tomatoes!” But she’s relentless. I love her spirit, though.

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