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Look at it, squat lil’ thing, boxy as Margot Tenenbaum’s frown. “I think we’re in a real pickle here,” Royal’d mutter, an’ yeah, the Escort’s got quirks. Gearbox clunks like a drunk uncle at a weddin’. But there’s charm, innit? Saw one pimped out once – spoiler big as me ego, made me laugh ‘til I cried. Proper mental! Then some twat nicked Dave’s stereo – made me ragey, wanna punch a wall. “You’re a bastard, Royal,” I’d yell, but nah, just life in the Escort lane.

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I rush outside, and there’s a truck flipped over! Like, what the heck? Turns out, some guy was speeding down the street and lost control. I mean, come on, it’s not a racetrack! I’m trying to help, but the driver’s just sitting there, dazed. I’m thinking, “Dude, you’re lucky to be alive!”

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