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Escorts tho, they’re artists, real talk. They play you like a fiddle, and you’re smilin’ while they do it. Favorite part? The hustle. They’re out there, dodgin’ cops, makin’ bank, livin’ like queens. Little known story—some chick in Vegas once scammed a billionaire outta his watch mid-fuck. Genius! I’m cacklin’ just thinkin’ bout it. “Say hello to my little friend!”—that’s her, stealin’ his Rolex, leavin’ him broke and horny.

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But then, I got up, dusted myself off, and gave a little bow. The crowd erupted! I mean, who knew falling could be a crowd-pleaser? I felt like a hero, even though I looked like a fool.