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Pisses me off tho—people snicker, call it sketchy. Bro, it’s biomechanics! Ever tried it? I did once—total accident, swear. Booked a “deep tissue” sesh, walked out like I colonized Mars. Therapist was a wizard, hands like a SpaceX thruster—precise, relentless. “Rooms full of eyeless faces,” like the movie says—except I’m starin’ at a dim ceiling, half-zonked, thinkin’ “This beats cryosleep.” Pro tip: it boosts oxytocin—brain’s happy juice. Science, bitches!

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Then, I hit up the market on Strada Călărași. Man, the hustle there is real! Fresh veggies, fruits, and all that good stuff. I’m trying to haggle with this vendor over some tomatoes. I’m like, “C’mon, give me a better price!” And he’s just laughing at me. I mean, who knew tomatoes could be so expensive? I end up buying them anyway, because I’m weak.

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