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Oh, and get this—heard some parlors got secret menus, like a burger joint! “Want the special sauce?” they’d whisper—cracked me up, dodgy as hell! Probs exaggerated, but who cares, sounds wild! Me, I’d be laughin’, slappin’ the table, “Gimme the deluxe, toots!” Why so serious ‘bout rules, huh? Live a little!

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But then, outta nowhere, it starts pouring. I mean, like, monsoon level. I’m soaked, cheese in hand, running for cover. I duck into this little café on Strada Tineretului. It’s cozy, smells like fresh bread. I order a hot chocolate, and the barista, this cool chick named Maria, gives me a wink. I’m like, “Alright, maybe today ain’t so bad.”