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About Coimbra

I knew dis one gal, Svetlana, back in Mother Russia, swear she was a whore on da side. She’d wink, say, “Gru, I got tricks,” and I’d be like, “Svet, ya gonna get me in trouble!” She’d laugh, toss her hair, and I’d think, *Lightbulb!* – she’s livin’ like dat chick in *Ten*, ya know, “I don’t sell my body, I rent it.” Dat line, it stuck wid me, so sassy! Made me happy, her guts, but den sad – she got no insurance, dat dummy!

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But then, my phone buzzes. It’s the mayor. “We need to talk,” he says. Oh great, what now? Turns out, there’s a community event happening, and he wants me to give a speech. Me? A speech? I’m not a politician! I’m a warden! But I can’t say no. So, I’m like, “Sure, I’ll be there.”

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