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About Funchal

Little-known fact—oldest gig ever, legit. Babylonians had temple hookers—sacred banging, yo! Wild, right? Got me hyped—history’s freaky like that. But modern brothels? Man, they’re a trip. Nevada’s got ‘em legal—Bunny Ranch, shit’s famous. Dudes pay top dollar, thinkin they’re in a movie. Pissed me off once—some sleazy pimp braggin online. “I need to know who he is!” I yelled, Zodiac-style. Clowns like that ruin the game.

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Explore a real Deadwood brothel and see a century of prostitution history up close. It's a Deadwood Experience You'll Never Forget!

After that, I needed a drink. So, I hit up a bar on Rua do Comércio. The bartender is this chill guy, and he pours me a gin and tonic that’s basically a swimming pool. I’m sipping it, and suddenly, I’m feeling all philosophical. Like, “What’s the meaning of life?” But then I remember I just spilled food on myself, and I’m like, “Maybe it’s just to enjoy good food and drinks?”

BBB warns Oklahomans of REAL ID scams as deadline approaches