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Dunno if it’s safe, tho—nasty, nasty! Cops nab ‘em sometimes, sneaky pigs. “Don’t be a schmuck!” I’d yell, but they don’t hear Gollum, nooo. One time, heard a tale—bloke paid, she ran, left him with nothin’ but a fake number, ha! Laughed me arse off—sucker! “You’re not in the game, you’re out!” like Belfort’d say, yesss.

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I get a call. Fire at the old mill near the river. Like, are you kidding me? That place is ancient! I grab my gear, and I’m out the door. I’m sprinting down Avenida da República, dodging old ladies and their shopping bags. They move like they own the place, I swear.

Why are wild boars roaming Spain's cities?