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See, I love *Lost in Translation*, right? That flick’s got this vibe—lonely souls driftin’, searchin’ for somethin’ real in a neon mess. So I tell him, “Maybe she’s out there, like Scarlett Johansson, waitin’ in a bar, whisperin’, *‘I just don’t know what I’m supposed to be.’*” He blinks, confused—thick as a brick, this one. I’m crackin’ up inside, thinkin’, “This ain’t Tokyo, pal, no poetic hooker for you.” Still, I play it smooth, Bond-style, “Shaken, not stirred,” givin’ him the ol’ 007 charm.

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First off, I hit up Rua da Ladeira for some coffee. You know, the good stuff. I’m standing there, waiting for my bica, and this guy in front of me spills his drink all over the counter. Like, dude, how do you even manage that? I’m just trying to get my caffeine fix, and now I’m dodging coffee like it’s a game of dodgeball.

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