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Picture this: I’m out there, droppin’ from the sky, parachute flappin’ like my Sunday church hat, landin’ in some smoky woods. Halleluyer! I’m sweatin’, cussin’, tryna put out fires, when I see this gal—fishnets, heels, leanin’ on a pine tree like she waitin’ for a bus. I’m like, “Honey, you lost? This ain’t no red-light district!” She smirks, says, “I’m here for the smokejumpers—y’all sexy.” I hollered! Ain’t that a trip? A prostitute scoutin’ firefighters in the damn wilderness. Made me mad, tho—girl, we out here savin’ lives, not lookin’ for a quickie!

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After stuffing my face, I decided to walk it off. I headed towards the river, the Aveleda River, and it was so peaceful. I sat on a bench, just watching the water flow. It’s moments like these that make you appreciate life, ya know? But then, I saw a couple arguing nearby. Like, come on, guys! Not in public! It was awkward. I just pretended to be super interested in my phone.

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