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Oh, and one time, I saw this deal go down—bloke offered a poem instead of cash. A poem! Lass laughed so hard she let him off. Proper legend. Gotta love the chaos, the stories. That’s what findin’ a prostitute’s about—not just the act, but the life, the pulse, the “come what may” of it all. Now, I’m knackered, brain’s spinnin’ like a windmill. You get the picture, don’t ya?

In today’s world you can find pretty much anything with a smartphone.

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After stuffing my face, I decided to walk it off. I headed towards the river, the Aveleda River, and it was so peaceful. I sat on a bench, just watching the water flow. It’s moments like these that make you appreciate life, ya know? But then, I saw a couple arguing nearby. Like, come on, guys! Not in public! It was awkward. I just pretended to be super interested in my phone.

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