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Little known fact - word is, she screwed some sailor back in ‘98, got a tattoo of his ship on her ass, but it’s upside down! D’oh! How do ya mess that up? Guy musta been drunker than me at Moe’s. Makes me giggle thinkin’ about it - her showin’ it off like, “Look at my art!” Yeah, right, Picasso of the red-light district.

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But then, outta nowhere, I get a call. It’s my mentor, and he’s like, “We need to talk.” My heart drops. What now? I’m thinking, “Did I mess up a spell?” I’m sweating bullets.