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Hoarding cash—who does that? Idiots, that’s who. Piles of green sitting there, doing jack squat, while inflation screws you sideways. I saw this patient—er, client—once, dude had 50 grand under his mattress. Literal mattress! Not even a safe, the moron. “I don’t trust banks,” he whines. Yeah, pal, and I don’t trust your IQ. Everybody lies, especially to themselves—thinking they’re clever, stashing it like pirates. Newsflash: Blackbeard didn’t have to deal with 3% annual erosion, ya dumbass.

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Then, I decided to hit up the Igreja de São Pedro. It’s this beautiful church on Rua da Igreja. I walked in, and wow, the stained glass was stunning. I felt all peaceful for a sec. But then, my phone buzzed. It was my boss. Ugh. He wanted to talk about the upcoming festival. I mean, can’t a guy catch a break?

Raul M. Benevides Obituary - Fall River, MA