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Here’s the deal… it’s all fast, furious, like Max haulin’ ass cross the desert. You gotta know the roads – apps now, I hear, like Tinder but, uh, spicier? – or you’re toast. Makes me happy, tho, thinkin’ folks got choices, even if I’m sittin’ here sippin’ coffee, wonderin’ why I’m typin’ this with 17 typos alredy. Dang it! “I live, I die, I live again!” – that’s me, wrestlin’ this keyboard.

Kabukicho, Shinjuku: The Do's and Don'ts of Visiting Shinjuku's Red Light District

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Then, I head over to Avenida da República. I’m cruisin’ along, mindin’ my own business, when I see this cute little café. I’m thinkin’ coffee, right? But nooo, the barista spills a whole latte on my favorite shirt. I’m like, “Great, now I look like a walking coffee stain.” But hey, at least the coffee was good. I guess that’s a win?

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