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Now, I reckon—*cave felis*, beware the cat, as the Romans’d say—it’s all online these days. Websites, apps, dodgy X posts—blimey, it’s a jungle! Saw one profile, right, lass called herself “Duchess of Soho”—cheeky, that! Made me laugh, then mad as a hatter—why’s it gotta be so shady? Could be simpler, like buyin’ a pint. But nope, you’re dodgin’ coppers, weirdos, and your own bloomin’ conscience.

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I left the shop feeling a bit deflated. I decided to take a walk by the Tagus River. The view is stunning, especially at sunset. I sat on a bench, just watching the water flow. It’s moments like that that make me love Abrantes. But then, I saw a couple arguing nearby. Like, really? Can’t you keep it down? I’m trying to enjoy my moment here!

‘Diamantino’s’ Gabriel Abrantes Talks About ‘The Marvelous Misadventures of the Stone Lady’