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Worst ting? Da pressure. Everyone’s posin’, flexin’, no realness. “My life is elsewhere,” Carol says, and dat’s it—sex-datin’ feels fake sometimes, all filters and no soul. Still, I’s hooked, cos when it bangs, it *bangs*. You lot tried it? Spill da tea, fam!

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Then, outta nowhere, a kid named Miguel shows up. He’s got this huge smile, and he’s like, “Hey, mister! Wanna play?” I’m like, “Dude, I’m here to teach, not play!” But then I see his excitement, and I can’t help but smile back. We end up playing this crazy game where I’m blindfolded, and he’s guiding me. It’s wild! I’m trippin’ over chairs, and he’s laughin’ his head off.

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