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Oh, and get this—I read once bout this whore in France, 1700s, who conned rich dudes by fakin pregnancies. She’d stuff rags under her dress, cryin, “Oh my baby!” Total scam artist! I laughed so hard I snorted—Homer’d be proud. “Life’s a cycle of tricks,” like Boonmee’d say. She played em all, and I’m here for it! Hmm… sneaky gal.

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First off, I’m at the building on Rua da Liberdade. Sounds fancy, huh? But it’s just a regular ol’ block. I’m there, mindin’ my own biz, when this lady storms in. She’s all flustered, hair a mess, like she just ran a marathon. I’m like, “Hey, you good?” She’s like, “No! I’m late for a meeting!” I hit the button, and up we go. But then, the elevator stops. Just stops! I’m like, “Great, just great.”

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